It's not meant to be sad. After years on medication for depression, I am working on going off of it because I feel much better than I used to. Able to feel more emotions.
Maggie Grace I relate so well to your words. Thank you for sharing them...I tend to not admit the lack of knowing the feeling of joy. It was discouraged...and never displayed that I can remember. I watch others to be able to define joy when I know it for myself.
I admire your courage with hope for finding joy beyond your imagination.
Thank you, Siggi. Awareness is a big part of my new phase of life. Not realizing I really haven't known some feelings is part of that. Numbed life. I'm sorry you relate so well. Hugs ♥
Maggie, When I started therapy in about 1988, it was something not spoken of... appointments were arranged so you should never meet another patient that was treated there.
I started treatment because menopause was around the corner and I believed that one's personality became more entrenched thru menopause ... and I decided to try and not become that angry old lady in the neighborhood. I can now see times I felt joy, but suppressed acknowledgement ... Joy is a fearful emotion for many.
Thank you again for your honesty and role modeling for others to follow.
Not understanding how your therapy didn't focus on feelings. It's sad when joy is not mirrored for us. I have known those afraid to feel "good". I hope you are moving more toward joy with your writing and photography and support online and painting (?). You are so talented, my friend.
Maggie... my therapy did focus on feelings...but I guarded them as if life depended on shielding them. I had to stay an extra week because I could or would not identify anger. It was growing up that the feelings were hidden. I am sorry I was not clear. It was a normal childhood for me...I knew no other concept. But I did watch others and wonder a lot of things about survival in those families.
Thanks for your ongoing support. I appreciate it. I also look forward to seeing growth in the future for both of us. Peace and love, Siggi
Beautiful series Maggie. That third haiku is a bit sad ...
ReplyDeleteIt's not meant to be sad. After years on medication for depression, I am working on going off of it because I feel much better than I used to. Able to feel more emotions.
DeleteSo pleased to hear of your joy Grace! :)
ReplyDeleteJoy
Welcome back.
ReplyDelete:)). It's not even back. It's first time not feeling depressed! Thank you.
DeleteI'm glad for you... and I'm glad there are so much to find for you in life.. I love your second one the most.
ReplyDeleteI really like that first one!
ReplyDeletethis set is so deeply personal
ReplyDeletei've had a few tastes of depression, so i can relate in a small way
sounds like you're moving in the right direction
Cheers!
JzB
Thanks, JzB. I think I will do better on this prompt when I know it more than fleetingly.
ReplyDeleteMaggie Grace
ReplyDeleteI relate so well to your words.
Thank you for sharing them...I tend to not admit the lack of knowing the feeling of joy. It was discouraged...and never displayed that I can remember. I watch others to be able to define joy when I know it for myself.
I admire your courage with hope for finding joy beyond your imagination.
Peace and love
Siggi
Peace
Siggi
Thank you, Siggi. Awareness is a big part of my new phase of life. Not realizing I really haven't known some feelings is part of that. Numbed life. I'm sorry you relate so well. Hugs ♥
DeleteMaggie,
ReplyDeleteWhen I started therapy in about 1988,
it was something not spoken of...
appointments were arranged so you should
never meet another patient that was treated there.
I started treatment because menopause was around the corner and I believed that one's personality became more entrenched thru menopause ... and I decided to try and not become that angry old lady in the neighborhood. I can now see times I felt joy, but suppressed acknowledgement ... Joy is a fearful emotion for many.
Thank you again for your honesty and role modeling for others to follow.
Peace and love,
Siggi
Not understanding how your therapy didn't focus on feelings. It's sad when joy is not mirrored for us. I have known those afraid to feel "good". I hope you are moving more toward joy with your writing and photography and support online and painting (?). You are so talented, my friend.
DeleteMaggie...
ReplyDeletemy therapy did focus on feelings...but I guarded them as if life
depended on shielding them. I had to stay an extra week because I could or would not identify anger. It was growing up that the feelings were hidden. I am sorry I was not clear. It was a normal childhood for me...I knew no other concept. But I did watch others and wonder a lot of things about survival in those families.
Thanks for your ongoing support. I appreciate it. I also look forward to seeing growth in the future for both of us.
Peace and love,
Siggi
Ohhhh, I understand! Yes, anger is usually a scary one for people to touch in therapy. But we all survive ♥
Deletereally nice ones, Maggie! I relate to the feeling of uncertainty about this whole "joy" idea :-)
ReplyDelete