Sunday, June 23, 2013

CD: Cherry Blossom Love

Carpe Diem Freestyle #1
Sedoka (Love Poem)


My first attempt to write a sedoka, a Japanese love poem with the form of 5-7-7-5-7-7.



Photo Source


cherry blossoms fall
petals landing in your hair
pink snow as you shake your head
i've come to love you
this season of blossoming
your touch says you love me too



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14 comments:

  1. Maude Lynn6/23/2013 8:44 PM

    Breathtaking work!

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    Replies
    1. Maggie Grace6/23/2013 9:39 PM

      Thanks so much, Mama Z! Do you know this form of poetry? Glad you enjoy it whether it's proper in tone or not. Love those cherry blossoms ♥

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  2. steph7/05/2013 5:58 PM

    Lovely. This style is new to me. Whether it adheres to a proper tone I don't know, but I know that I like it.

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  3. Maggie Grace7/05/2013 6:18 PM

    Björn has left a new comment on your post "dVerse: Cherry Blossom Love":

    I think you did it great. And actually there are two perspectives, the first stanza about the events of cherry blossoms and the second how the feelings affect you. I think you did great honour to the sedoka.

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    Replies
    1. Maggie Grace7/05/2013 6:20 PM

      Björn, You were fast. I changed the dVerse in the title to CD and your comment doesn't show up now...so I cut and paste it. Thank you so much for your perspective. I wasn't seeing what you are seeing I trust you to know what I did...lol that sounds confusing. Maybe next time I can do it intentionally.

      Delete
  4. Anonymous7/05/2013 6:51 PM

    I was stopped, for a moment, struck, at "I've come to love you/this season of blossoming"

    very beautiful! I do not know sedoka well, but I love this poem.

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  5. joanne7/05/2013 7:31 PM

    a tender, gorgeous love poem....reminiscent of my youth,,,

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  6. Jazzbumpa7/05/2013 8:19 PM

    very sweet.

    Cheers!
    JzB

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  7. Anonymous7/06/2013 6:59 AM

    That brings a good feeling.. Lovely creation! I loved the tenderness of cherry blossoms and how it compliments the same tenderness of love.

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  8. Maggie Grace7/06/2013 1:29 PM

    Am so happy you liked it! I did too but just wasn't sure about the nuance of Japanese poetry. I love writing about cherry blossoms. Wonderful of you to visit and comment. Brings me such joy ♥

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  9. WabiSabi7/06/2013 5:26 PM

    This is so lush and romantic and honors the sedoka form beautifully ! Love it.Tanka Whirl

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  10. Chèvrefeuille7/06/2013 8:51 PM

    Nice romantic sedoka Maggie. Thank you for sharing ...

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  11. Siggi in Downeast Maine7/11/2013 1:07 AM

    Lovely. Thanks for sharing
    Peace
    Siggi

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