Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Turtle Art At Moma

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brain map complete
i have no quiet mind
my waves are so out of normal range
i see the art my brain makes
my calming music is a tiny pink area
all waves together look like
turtle art at MOMA
reptilian brain I joke
but it's not funny

listening to my calming music
during my first treatment
post complete mapping
my brain is writing haiku
and this
proof again of racing mind

five days antidepressant free
my emotions for the first time ever
are my own
an integrated mind
with full range of feelings
i feel like a juggler
wondering about this new normal
yet i've reached my goal

begin neurofeedback
without antidepressants
i know not of the medication afterlife
but withdrawal was a bitch
a year from now
perhaps i won't be writing
while dizzy
and wondering if healing
to this extent
is worth it

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