Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Empty Nest

Friday Fictioneers - April 19


Write 100 words using the photo as a prompt:



It was the last thing he had done for her. She was so afraid of the hornets that had made a nest near the back door onto the deck. Her loving husband abandoned his television golf tournament at sunset to kill the nest. He knocked it off the underside of the deck railing before leaving for work the next day.

A phone call told her of the tractor trailer that plowed directly into the driver's side of her husband's car. Funny how, on the anniversary of his death, she found the deserted hornets' nest. Perhaps it
was a special sign.

32 comments:

  1. Oh what a sad tale Grace... really stings my heart.

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    1. Stings your heart...goes with the tale. Am honored you were first to read and comment.

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  2. What a way to go! The randomness and immediacy to the end of life should make us all live in the day and prepare for our end.

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    1. Probably had Boston on my mind. It can happen in a flash :(

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  3. Maggie, I think that if someone died likes this, small things such as you described, would be things that would hurt almost more than the big things because they wouldn't be expected.

    janet

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    1. Yes, I think so too. Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment.

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  4. Sad Maggie, but from a writing perspective a very clever use of the play on words, empty nest. I liked it. Well done.

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    1. Thank you, Penny. I had struggled with a title because the previous blog entry is "Abandoned". Am glad you liked it even though sad.

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  5. Oh, this is sad. I have to echo Penny, she stole my line. To see that nest would only intensify her grief, but maybe not, as it would be a symbol of his love for her.

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    1. I have a synchronistic view of life so my intent was that it was a rememberance of his love and kindness. Thanks, Ted, for visiting and commenting.

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  6. A tragic ending after a tender beginning with her husband's good deed to remove the hornet's nest. You set up deep emotions in your story. Well written.

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  7. the wheel of karma yeah !?

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  8. Poignant. Nice interpretation of the prompt, and very lovely writing!

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    1. Thank you for your compliment and your time!

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  9. I was expecting him to be killed by a rogue hornet as retribution.

    I enjoyed your bit of flash.

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    1. Thank you, Carrie! I did learn in real life that it's best to wait till after sunset because the hornets are not active then. My mind doesn't think rogue genetically engineered hornet. lol I was safely inside when it happened though.

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  10. you've spun a deeply emotional, sad tale from this image, quite unexpected. well done!

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  11. a sweet visual of the little unseen things that loved ones do (that we should appreciate)

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    1. Thank you. Yes, I meant it to be a sweet gesture that a husband would do for a wife. Glad you thought so :))

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  12. What a nostalgic and poignant vignette! Well done.

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  13. Oh, how sad...but how well written.

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  14. Dear Maggie,
    This one leaves a lump in my throat. Perfect title for a poignant tale.
    shalom,
    Rochelle

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  15. OH! Bam. I felt shivers on my spine. Are we to think that the hornets caused his death? (That was how I read it initially.) Your fine writing touched a nerve: my already irrational fear of all things that sting or bite. Great story.

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  16. What power those little guys have! Eerie and well written.

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  17. Brilliantly told little tale that packed just about everything into so few words. Loved it.

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  18. Very nice story. The last things have so much more significance. Is she the kind of person to take the hornets' nest in and put it on the mantle?

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  19. Good story Maggie, nothing wrong with sad, sad is good because you made us feel. I also liked the title, with its double meaning. :)

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