Monday, May 6, 2013

Close Encounters (3)

Write At The Merge Week 19


(Libby's previous story can be found here.)

Write up to 500 words using the photo prompt 
of cherry blossoms.



Photo Source


Such a beautiful Spring day for a jog with the cherry trees in full bloom and barely a cloud in the sky, Libby thought exiting her workplace. She could watch the bright pink sunset on the second half of her jog. After changing into her exercise clothes at home, she was on her way. Loving when she got into that adrenaline high, it felt like the rest of the world dissolved, her body on auto-pilot, and she could think clearly and deeply. When Libby went into “the zone”, she sometimes wondered who was watching her route ensuring she didn’t trip. She had come to accept she was in safe hands even if not consciously present.

While lost in thought, Libby heard a man’s voice say, “I’ve been waiting for you.” The tone was deep and demanding of respect. She swung her head around to see who had spoken to her. No one was there. 

“Not there,” said the same voice impertinently. 

She shook her head as if to make sure she wasn’t hearing voices.

“I’m in here and you are not crazy,” the voice said emphatically.

Libby stopped dead in her tracks. She knew without a doubt the voice had come from inside her mind. She sat on the bench at the side of the path, head in her hands, remembering the vision she had before of the man in the tuxedo at the top of the beautiful hill. When he had appeared, her thoughts had been interrupted by a phone call so she hadn’t tried to find out who he was; although she often imagined the flowery hill to calm herself when feeling anxious.

She thought she was thinking to herself but really mumbled aloud. “Are YOU the man in the tuxedo?” not believing she was actually asking.

“Indeed, I am.”

Okay, Libby thought. Ask the question you really want to know. “Are you my inner wisdom?"

“What do YOU think?” he replied in the same know-it-all pompous voice.





Words: 330


14 comments:

  1. So intriguing! I am so curious to know who the man is. LM x

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    1. Hopefully next week's prompt will allow me to reveal that. Thank you for reading and your curiosity for more!

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  2. That's a wonderful image, and the picture goes with it so well!
    We have a serial going on at my team blog as well.

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  3. Definitely intriguing.
    You got off to a rough start. That first paragraph uses almost a different language set then the rest of the story. It felt awkward.

    But the rest is good enough that I want more!

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    1. You are right. This is a continuation and I didn't do so well having this stand on it's own from that first paragraph. Will play with it and see if I can make it smoother. I very much appreciate your feedback!

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  4. Intriguing is the right word - Looking forward to finding out who/what that voice represents.

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  5. I love stories about visions and intuition and this one grabbed me. How do you do with so few words!!! I liked your dialogue and it led me to the voice in her mind. I hope there is more coming about this man and why she's seeing him.

    I noticed you changed your site. I like it:~)

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    1. Am so glad you are intrigued by such things as I love to write about them. Changed my site? You mean I added icons for the challenges I follow? It's so I don't forget. lol

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  6. Oh wow! This is definitely interesting - to say the least. ...who is he????!? More!

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    1. I don't know if you receive reply comments but the ending was slightly revised as well as the beginning due to feedback. Hope you still like it! Thank you for your comment!

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  7. I'm intrigued too, but his tone worries me. Inner wisdom or not, I'm afraid of him...

    Keep it coming Maggie! This story is too good to leave me hanging like this!!

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    1. I will, Valerie. Got you right where I want you ;-O And thanks again for your enthusiasm and encouragement!

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  8. I make it a rule not to trust smooth men who speak straight into my thoughts. :) Love the use of the cherry blossoms.

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